Gross and Painful things on my mind

Grossest thing that happened yesterday by far:
I was washing the dishes and a 2 inch cockroach stuck his head, nay, his whole body, out from the drain. The water was running, and it was struggling to live. Needless to say, his appearance was so shocking at first I screamed in horror and then in utter disgust, blasted on the water, and ran the food disposal for about 2 minutes. So gross.

The other gross thing from yesterday: I was putting roundup on our unruly weeds, and there was a large, disgusting snail lying in my path. I didn't have anything else on hand, so I just sprayed it with roundup. It is just as effective as salt, btw, in making the nasty buggers shrivel and die, except this guy also had the effect of turning into green slime.

Somebody recently asked me if the reason I use salt on the slugs and snails is because I want to go organic. HA! No, it's because it's way handier to just grab the salt shaker and dump it on these nasty excuses for living organisms than to find the slugicide or whatever it's called that's in the garage. I stocked up on salt from the dollar store, so I am pretty liberal with my use. Organic shmorganic.

Just thinking about slugs and snails makes me want to puke. They look exactly like boogers except if I ever had a booger the size of a small snail...well I don't even want to go there.

But Danny and I have a debate on which is worse: cockroaches or mosquitoes. Danny has lovingly spent hours and hours cleaning the disgusting algae out of the pool (algae is not as nasty as slugs and cockroaches, not even close), getting attacked mercilessly by hoards of mosquitoes every time. I get bitten, too, during the 5 minutes I am outside each day. Danny's poor poor ankles are bumpy with bites. He even has some on his fingers, ohhh! But despite my lover's injuries, I shall persist in defending the cockroach argument. Danny: "But they don't bite, they don't sting, they don't really do anything except look gross, unless you let them take over and then they can literally drive you out of your home..." Me: "Okay, let's change the subject." :::shudder::::

This doesn't count as gross per se, but it feels gross, nay painful. Pregnancy heartburn. I had heartburn before I was pregnant. It was crappy. But it's way worse when I'm pregnant, and maybe I just forgot how crappy it was last time, but I really think it's worse this time. I had just gotten up at 2:10 am to get the antacid tablets, when Danny started saying to me, "Hey, I found out what causes heartburn today! Your sphincter muscle letting acid into your esophagus." How interesting. For him. I could have told him that, minus a few big words. All I know is that when I eat pizza when I'm NOT pregnant, I usually get heartburn. And usually it's way worse when it's homemade because the sauce is so deliciously tomato-ey, I think. But reading up on it just now, online (dangerous thing to do with health topics! If I weren't pregnant I'd be worried about having heart disease probably), I learned that some of the worst foods for heartburn in general are: tomatoes, onions, and cheese. Well that's about half the ingredients in my pizza. Also, if you eat a lot in one sitting. So maybe the moral of the story is not to eat half the pizza in one sitting if you want to be able to sleep the next night. But it was sooooooo gooooooooood and I wasn't even FULL after! Well, I was full, and felt great, but definitely not stuffed and moaning. NEVER AGAIN!

But I will probably end up doing dishes again, despite the cockroach nest that may or may not live down the disposal.